There is interesting evidence that how women feel about their body has little to do with how their body looks and far more to do with what they tell themselves repeatedly. If you pay attention to how you talk to yourself, you may be shocked. Will you begin paying attention to what you say to yourself and take notice? Do you say something like “you are disgusting, fat, ugly, your thighs are hideous etc.” each day to yourself? Most women do, many times a day.

When we become aware of what we say to ourselves we may realize that we would never let a friend or lover speak to us with such little love, respect or honor. We can be buoyed by the evidence that we can change these thoughts, slowly but surely, if we decide we want to. And that this change can makes a real difference in our lived experience of our body and how we interact with others. We can essentially choose to notice these negative thoughts and re-train the brain to take a different route.

Current neuroscience research is showing that the brain makes circuits that it gets used to running and that these neural pathways get strengthened as the thoughts become habitual. So if you have made cruel body-hating thoughts a habit for yourself, you will probably continue to unless you choose to interrupt those thoughts and re-direct them. If you choose to re-direct your thoughts, slowly but surely, the brain circuits can begin to adjust.

What we think about ourselves matter, it effects how we treat ourselves, what we deem ourselves worthy of, what we go for in life or don’t. How women feel about their body determines a lot of other intersecting factors in life. It is important that we begin to choose to adjust our thoughts to be more kind to ourselves, thought by thought, day by day. Because how we choose to speak to ourselves and our body matters, because we matter.